Pee Wee Herman Exonerated!!!

America can now sleep a little better at night knowing that Pee Wee Herman, was NOT indeed masturbating at an adult movie theater back in July of 1991.  This is actually somewhat dated news, but for some reason, did NOT make national headlines because we live in a world where the media would rather focus on making serial killers famous...

I had never known the full story about just what had transpired on the night of July 26th, 1991 in South Trail Cinema in South Florida.  From the impression I got as a young child, Pee Wee Herman had been at a REGULAR movie theater, when suddenly, he got up in front of the screen and dropped his trousers revealing his genitals to the audience and laughing in a Pee Wee fashion.  This however, was NOT the case, but who was to know?


The real story.

Paul Reubens (aka the lovable Pee Wee Herman) was in South Florida visiting his folks, during a hiatus from work.  At around 9:30 pm, he suddenly began feeling sort of horny.  Like any guy feeling horny stuck in a house with their parents would do, he decided to check out the local adult movie theater.  At approximately 10pm, Reubens was settled down to watch an all time classic "Nurse Nancy" starring Sandra Scream. 

Well according to the police report, where Reubens is referred to as the "Def"(defendant), the officer "did observe the Def's penis exposed. The Def did begin to masterbate his exposed penis with his left hand. At approx 2035 hrs, the Def did again expose his penis and masterbate again."

Now, Reubens did not fight for the case to go to trial, for the attention would have been too humiliating.  Instead, 4 months later he pleaded "no contest" to indecent exposure, was ordered to pay a $50.00 fine and do 70 hours of community service.
2 years later, a Florida judge ended up erasing the incident from Paul's permanent record.

It wasn't until 2010 in an interview with Playboy magazine that Paul addressed the incident and spoke of his innocence.   (This is basically what I mean by exonerated, not actually exonerated per se)
"In the event of a trial (which never happened), an expert researcher was going to testify he'd never seen a person masturbate with a non-dominant hand. "I’m right-handed, and the police report said I was jerking off with my left hand. That would have been the end of the case right there, proof it couldn’t have been me."

See folks, he is RIGHT handed, and the police officer said he was using his LEFT hand...that's enough proof for me!

In other, old Pee Wee Herman news, it was reported in 2010 that Judd Apatow was in collaboration with Reubens to make a new Pee Wee movie. The movie was "described as an on-the-road movie built around a big adventure."
Time will tell if this thing ever comes to fruition.  Fingers crossed.